Welcome Home
Ginger, my lovely wife, and I just returned from an Alaskan cruise. We had three days in a boat then seven on land. Our 49th state is beautiful. On the ship, everything we could want was within walking distance. Then during the land portion, a lovely young lady named Shayla did an excellent job of taking care of us. We like being taken care of. Now we’re back in South Carolina feeding horses, dogs, fishes, the cat, and of course, ourselves. Welcome home.
Our air travel is worth mentioning. There was one occasion when we were sitting, looking at a plane out the concourse windows. The board said that flight would leave at 9:00, and that it was, “On time.” Of course, it was already 9:17 and the doors weren’t shut yet. I suppose that could be considered airline humor. Our own flight was originally scheduled for 7:33. It was postponed several times and the gate changed twice. At one time the projected departure time hit 9:55. Then it actually moved sooner to 9:41. I asked the airline’s agent about it. He said the time did change, and we were scheduled to depart at 9:41, but it’d probably be late. Funny. It didn’t leave until well after 10:00.
Enough about travel. What I really want to discuss is food. It seemed to be a theme through the whole vacation. On the boat our biggest problem was when, which restaurant, and what we wanted to eat. This wasn’t new. We seem to have a history of eating copious amounts of food on vacation.
Early in our relationship, Ginger and I visited Colonial Williamsburg. After a whole day of touristing, we were hot, dirty and very hungry. We spent some time looking for food before we discovered Martha Washington’s Inn. Unfortunately, they had an upscale clientele. Everyone was dressed in suits and ties except us. We were in tee shirts and jeans. They were clean. We were dirty and sweaty. They were polite. We were hungry and facing the most impressive buffet I’d ever seen. There were four different types of shrimp, every meat you could imagine, breads, and I feel sure there were vegetables. But after 27 years, it’s not the vegis I remember. We stuffed ourselves. You know how you can eat until you’re full, wait, and then eat more. We did that multiple times. We actually stood and was preparing to leave when we saw the dessert table. There were cobblers, ice cream, and five different cheesecakes. We ate even more. It was all we could do to crawl back to our motel room, lie on the bed, moan, and swear we’d never do that again.
And we didn’t, for a couple of years. We were visiting Myrtle Beach and discovered an all-you-can-eat, seafood buffet. Delicious fried fish, shrimp, and crabs. Again, I’m sure there were vegetables, but who cares. We ate past where we couldn’t eat any more. Then we ate more. We found ourselves in our motel room again, moaning, swearing to never do it again. And we didn’t, until the next night. It’s not that we didn’t know better. We’re just very weak people.
During the Alaskan cruise, we never ate to the point where we were comatose. We didn’t need to. We could eat as much and as often as we wanted. This wasn’t a sprint. It was a marathon. On the Lido deck they started serving food at 5:30. I was usually there at 5:30. I don’t know when they quit, but it was well after my bedtime. All that eating was exhausting. They had a bar for appetizers, sandwiches, entrees, pastas, and of course, desserts. The dessert bar stayed open even when the others were closed. We ate everything. We found ourselves talking about our mid-afternoon snack while devouring lunch. If we planned to go to a show in the evening, we’d make sure we ate before, to prevent getting hungry, and again after to hold us over until breakfast. It was great. We’re so weak.
Heavier than we were, we came home to a house void of food. It wasn’t a mistake. We intentionally ate it all before we left so it didn’t go bad. We didn’t know we’d come home with a food Jones demanding we eat every hour. On vacation we could have eaten less, came home lighter, integrated easier, but it was there, we were there. The price was right.
We’re acclimating. The refrigerator is full again, and yesterday, I actually went three hours without eating. It was hard, but everyone needs a goal. I would like to say we won’t ever do it again. But we all know it’s not true. Have I mentioned that we’re very weak people?